Wednesday, January 2, 2013

You can't help how you feel

Many wonderful people have left sweet, loving and heartfelt comments on my blog post from December 18th and on Meghan's Hope Facebook page.  I've read each and every one of them.  I'd like to respond to each one individually but I am not sure that is a reasonable expectation.  Instead, I will try to respond more globally here over several posts.

First off, thank you so much for your condolences and for sharing that post.  Even now, 8 years later, it is music to my ears to hear people say they are sorry for my loss.  To see Meghan's name, especially those of you who said you listened to Meggie, made me smile.  You acknowledged her life, her meaning to me, her spirit.  Her name is sweet music to my ears.  Hearing how her story has been shared and shared again (that one post has been viewed more than 270,000 times thus far) is so overwhelming, it makes me SO very happy and grateful.  To know that many more children will sleep in safer rooms and homes tonight because of Meghan's story is exactly why I wrote about it. Thank you.

In reading everyone's comments there are several common themes and emotions expressed.  Sadness was probably the prevailing emotion.  So many of you wrote through your tears.  I am deeply touched by it.  I must say I am both sorry I brought so many of you to tears yet in another way, so glad I did.  Choosing to write such a personal, detailed and raw emotional account of that day was not made lightly.  It took 8 years for me to feel comfortable enough to put my heart out there for the public to see.  It was not without risk.  People don't like to talk about death.  They don't like to think about death.  They have no idea what it's like to hold a dead child, unless they've experienced it themselves and no one ever wants to think about that.  I threw it out there in everyone's face.  Exposing oneself in such a vulnerable state, you never know if or how people will respond.  I hoped people would be supportive, that they'd be able to *be* with me, that they'd be moved by our story of love and ultimately it would make children safer.

I know it was not easy for many to read.  I know not everyone was able to read it or all of it.  Many of those who commented had near misses with falling furniture or TV's and their children and it hit really close to home in a 'it could have been me" sort of way.  To all of those parents, I'm so glad it wasn't you and I'm so grateful for your support and sharing of Meghan's story.

Others had lost children to other causes.  Cancer, stillbirth, prematurity, car accidents, genetic diseases, fires, suicide and more.  I am so very sorry for their losses as well.  I can't imagine their experience, for it's different, yet the same.  Reading my account of Meghan's angel day brought back their own experience.  Some are just not able to go 'there' into their pain as I did.  It triggers their pain and grief.  I understand that.  I respect that.  I knew it was likely to happen for some people who read it.  We all grieve differently.  We all process differently.  There is no right or wrong way, just your way.  This is a very important lesson for those supporting someone who has lost a loved one to know.

My way is (obviously) to write and talk about it.  It's how I process.  It's how I heal.  I know not everyone wants to hear it or can handle it.  While I understand, appreciate and respect that, I still have to do what's best for me.  Because in the end, only I know what's best for my heart and soul.  There is much more to it than that, but that's for another post on another day.

Many who have lost a child or loved one commented on how it reminded them of how they felt the day of their own child's death, how they wished their friends and family knew what their experience was like, even now, years later.  Many shared the same frustrations with how people respond after the death of a child or any loved one, thinking they are being helpful in what they say or do but really just adding salt to the wound.  In a way, it helps us parents who are members of this club we never wanted to be a part of know we are not alone.  That our experience of grief is our own and different, yet much the same.  Being able to connect with someone who understands that is healing and validating in and of itself.

Many of you commented on my 'strength'.  It is not about strength at all.  Strength is a physical attribute.  My desire to write, to talk about, to share Meghan's life and death, and the mission I have in Meghan's Hope is all about love.  Nothing but love.  Love for my daughter, love for families of all kinds and L.O.V.E.   I am not strong.  I just want others to learn from my mistakes.  I'm just a mama who loved her daughter and never wants another mama to ever know the pain I do, to never have to go through what our family did.  It's really that simple.  Love.

Here's the crux of today's post:  Feelings need to be validated!

The one thing people have said many times over to me over the years, whenever I've expressed how I feel responsible for Meghan's death is that I shouldn't feel guilty, that it was not my fault.  Many who have commented on my blog posting have said the same.

Guilt is defined as a feeling of responsibility or remorse for some event...whether real or imagined per Dictionary.com

While I appreciate that those who told me it was not my fault meant well, what they don't understand is that no one can help how they feel.  It is what it is.  Would you say the same to me if I said I felt sad or angry or depressed because of Meg's death?  Probably not.  Those are more 'acceptable' emotions for people.  Guilt is an emotion we as a society are not comfortable with.  Responsibility is often a concept we as a society are not good at.  We like to blame anyone and anything but ourselves. In times of grief there is a tendency to want to 'make it better' with platitudes.  It rarely makes it better for the person experiencing the grief.

There are certain facts in the story of Meghan's death.

  • Her dresser was not secured to the wall
  • It fell on her and killed her
  • As her parent, I would be the one responsible to do something to protect her, whether or not I knew to secure her dresser or thought it was necessary are secondary.  
  • Had her dresser been secured to the wall, it would not have fallen on her that day and she would be alive
  • I could have easily blamed any number of other things.  Her father for convincing me it wasn't a danger, the manufacturer, the pediatrician for not warning me like they do about other childproofing 'necessities', 'bad luck' or 'God' somehow needing her.  None of those things resonated with me.  I don't believe in being a victim. I don't believe in blame.  I don't believe in 'luck' or 'coincidence' or even a God that would think a child should be anywhere else besides their mother's arms. 
In saying that it was my fault, in saying that I carry guilt in my heart for not keeping her safe, I'm telling you how I feel.  I feel sad that she died.  I'm sad that I didn't do everything I could have to prevent it from happening.  I am accepting responsibility for my in-action.  No, I didn't think her dresser would tip.  Still, I had other things secured to the wall, I could have done the same to her dresser, I didn't.  I let others convince me it wasn't necessary.  I was wrong.   I paid for it with my daughter's life.  The harsh reality is her death could have been prevented.  Nothing will ever change that in my heart, my head or my soul being.  It is how I feel.  It's how I will always feel.  Nothing anyone can say will ever change that.  

It doesn't mean I'm stuck there, for I'm not.  If I were, I'd probably never have ever gotten out of bed again. I certainly wouldn't have been able to write all that I have.  I wouldn't be able to function the way I am. I don't wallow in it.  I've processed it. I've accepted it.  I've integrated it.  It's part of who I am.  It's changed who I am.  I can only hope I'm a better mother, educator, and human being for it. I can only try to prevent it from happening to others. 

The thing is, accepting responsibility for your role in and accepting your feelings of guilt over your child's death are not bad.  It can be a very important part of healing.  Not everyone feels a sense of guilt.  Yet so many other parents feel responsible for their child's death, especially those who were born premature or were stillborn or lost shortly after birth.  There was likely nothing that could have been done to know or prevent their deaths, but yet they feel responsible, somehow guilty.  If only they had....  They need their feelings to be acknowledged and heard. They often carry that burden with them to their own grave, too afraid to speak it, too afraid to own it because society has assigned such a stigma to it.  Because everyone tells them it's not their fault and not to feel guilty.  Imagine how painful that is, to feel so strongly and yet no one is willing to engage in conversation about how YOU feel because THEY can't fathom it or are not comfortable with it. 

Here's a secret, it doesn't change how we feel.  We feel the way we feel.  We can't help it.  It's a part of us. It may or may not be 'true' to you, but it is to us.  No matter what you say, it doesn't change how we feel right now.  In fact, it can make it worse when well meaning people tell us not to feel a certain way, because our feelings are not being validated and accepted for what they are.  Grief is hard enough without people telling us what we feel is wrong!  Frankly, no one knows how we feel except for us.  What all grieving people need is to be supported in their grief.  To be listened to and heard.  To have their feelings validated, accepted, explored.  Whatever those feelings are and no matter how often they might change.  Be a good listener.  But don't tell them they are wrong for how they feel.  

Please don't take this the wrong way.  I deeply appreciate the sentiment and well-intentioned statements of everyone who told me not to feel guilty and that it wasn't my fault. I really do.  I see this as a tremendous opportunity to share with you how I arrived at that place in my heart and head and that it's really OK.  I'm OK.  I want to shed a bit of light on what is helpful and what is not to many who are grieving.  They don't need to be told what is right or wrong.  They need to know whatever they feel is OK and you are there to listen whenever they want to talk about it. 

What's a better thing to say to someone you know who is grieving?  "I'm so sorry, I can't even imagine what that's like"  "Do you want to talk about it?"  "Tell me more about how you feel"  "Can I do anything to help?"  "I'm here for you.  Anytime you want to talk, just call"  Or how about a hug, some shared stories and tears and some tea... or chocolate?   Listen.  Be there.  Surround them with love and support.  That's what they need.  

Thank you, for listening.  I'm going to go have some chocolate.  Care to join me?  






41 comments:

  1. I am so very sorry for your loss. No one can ever take your feelings away. Know that Meggie's death is not in vain. At a minimum my 2 and 4 year olds will be sleeping in much safer bedrooms tomorrow night. God bless.

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  2. I heard about Meggie's story years ago and was instantly alarmed seeing as I was a young mother and had never really considered something so atrocious happening. We immediately made sure all of our furniture was secure. I remember coming home after a night out. We relieved the babysitter and I went to check on my then 2 year old who was sound asleep in his bed. I kissed his forehead and said goodnight and as I was leaving his room I noticed that his dresser was "off". When I checked the strap it was taut and holding the dresser in place. I still don't know what happened, but as a mother I can only imagine what COULD have happened and give thanks to you and Meggie for saving my precious boy's life. Thank you so much for sharing Meggie's story and raising awareness on something so easily overlooked and yet so easily preventable!

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  3. What a remarkably honest and realistic view. Most of us can't bear to be this honest with ourselves, nevermind with others. You are right when you say we as a society are not comfortable with guilt or with responsibility. Everyone is always passing the blame, finding a reason or a justification. Rarely does someone say 'This was mine to take care of and I blew it, plain and simple. And it cost me dearly. Learn something from my heartache.' I admire your ability to face it head on.

    I found your page thru a friend's post on Facebook. My daughter is 6...my son is 17. I think of how many dangers they've lived with over the years, dangers that I placed there, and didn't protect them from. Dangers that are still present...being six doesn't keep her from climbing on or pushing things. These dangers will be eliminated this weekend - and your Meggie's story will be shared with her too. She needs to know this can happen, just as much as I needed to be reminded.

    Thank you for sharing with the rest of us, and helping us be spared your heartache. God be with you and yours.

    jenepher

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  4. I to lost my 5 year old daughter that same year in November. She had been diagnosed with leukemia on a Monday and passed away 8 days later. I often ask myself what if we had gone to a different hospital for treatment, what if I had somehow forced the nurses to listen to what I was saying when I told them something was wrong and they kept reassuring me what I thought was wrong was normal. It wasnt normal and I failed as a parent, as a protector to raise enough of a fuss to force them to take me seriously. I used to ask the "why" question. Sometimes when I would see other kids who survived I'd feel extreme anger. Then I remind myself of how I to would never wish this on another parent or grandparent etc. The guilt, the pain, the hole in your heart and soul is never gone. Your just able to breathe easier over the years. The ONLY ray of light I have in my heart that helps me get through is she never had to experience the ugliness of cancer in its entirety. You will see your baby again. She is a beautiful angel.

    Btw, although all my furniture is securely strapped I went further and installed drawer latches on anything that would/could open if tipped slightly or all the way. I also made my husband drill holes in our walls to run cable etc so there are no lose cords out. We will be building a new home soon and I will be having light sockets installed behind all TVs, on the floors, etc. I do not want anything that can be pulled over onto any child in my home easily reached etc.

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    1. Cora,

      I'm so sorry to hear of the loss of your daughter. Hugs to you! I hope you can feel her love and light in and around you!

      Thank you for your message.

      Wishing you peace,
      kim

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  5. Thank you for being so open and honest, and articulate about grief, and validating feelings. You hit the nail on the head about our society wanting to comfort themselves with platitudes. Feelings are meant to be felt and all you can do is ride the wave. Having someone to lean on is good sometimes, but not if they are simply there to soothe their own egos.

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  6. tears soaked my face as i read your post about the day Meggie died. my son was killed in a car accident. i appreciate you saying you like to hear her name. it seems so many times that when people talk about family events my sons name is avoided. my son was named Dusty. your daughter was named Meghan and their time with us was precious. my Dusty loved children. I am helping to raise his son and two other grandkids live with me. before I posted this I took some leather belts and screws and washers and used them to anchor the furniture in my house to the walls. the leather belts were outdated and going in the trash. they are great for holding the furniture and did not cost a thing but what a priceless treasure they could save. Thank you for sharing Meghan's life and death with us. May God send angels to comfort you.

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    1. I'm so sorry for the loss of Dusty. What a great name! I hope you feel him with you in spirit.

      Thank you for your message.

      Wishes for peace,
      Kim

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  7. I have a 2.5 year old. We mounted our television, but I never ever thought about furniture. I read your story and cried. I am so sorry. And I am moved to action... I'm buying securing mounts now.

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  8. I want to thank you and Meggie for saving so many lives and injuries. I can almost feel her light as I read your words of pure love for your baby girl, what a beautiful little soul. As proud of you are of her,I have to tell you she is equally if not more proud of her Mamma and is bursting with love for you. Your words touched me to my core and resinated something inside of me telling me I needed to share your story. I did so not only thank you for giving me the push to secure my furniture but thank you for the other parents who have read my posts and messages. Love and light

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  9. So many times, something "bad" happens, and people just have no idea what to say. I'm a nurse, and that certainly doesn't help in efforts to comfort people. I really appreciate this post, and the little snippets at the end of things I can say that really will be comforting (hopefully) to the person suffering the loss.

    Thank you for sharing your gut-wrenching story, for sharing the raw emotion of what you felt then, and what you still feel now. Like the ladies above have posted - thank you for all of the education this has provided and for the lives that you and Meggie have saved, or severe injuries prevented, due to your sharing. Your loss is so unfortunate, but the world is safer because of your sweet angel.

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    1. Thank you for your message. I'm glad it was able to help a little bit!

      Peace,
      Kim

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  11. So very well put!

    No one is EVER wrong for how they feel, and it's a fact that many people overlook simply because they themselves feel differently. If everyone would learn to see things from all sides, to learn to understand that not everyone is made up of the same pieces, there would be a lot less judgement in this world.

    Kudos to you for understanding that securing the dresser would have prevented her death that day, and for declaring it exactly what it is: a fact. Kudos to you for coming to terms with the fact that you should have made sure it was secure, and for letting your own error be a lesson to so many others. You're so right when you say that people would rather place blame on anyone else than accept responsibility for their own actions (or in-actions).

    Sharing such a vulnerable side of yourself with others, knowing that it will help them in a great way is so selfless, and is exactly what humanity is all about. You deserve some kind of award for this, truly.

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  12. You are in my thought and prayers. Thanks for sharing your story.

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  13. As a mommy I too read your story through tear filled eyes. I am so sorry for your loss.
    I do thank you for your story. Today my husband secured dressers and doll houses to the walls in my children's rooms.
    You are giving others something through your tragedy. I'm sure your Meggie is smiling down on you.

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  14. Thank you, Kim, for the two paragraphs beginning "Here's a secret,..." I grieve for my inability to have children, for the loss of my husband, for my inability to make any relationship work since his death 11 1/2 years ago. Right now I am grief-stricken about a troubled relationship. I like those two paragraphs because I'm tired of people telling me how to feel, what to fight for, or to get over someone I still love.

    Thank you for sharing your story of love and loss.

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    1. Thank you for your message. I'm glad you found a bit of it that resonated with you and helped you in your journey. I'm so sorry for your losses. Look deep inside you and follow your gut and your heart. It won't lead you astray.

      peace,
      Kim

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  15. So incredibly honest. Not only have I learned that even a short dresser can tip over, injure or kill a child and needs to be secured, but also how to be a good friend when handling such uncomfortable topics such as death, and you've also opened my mind to accept and explore other uncomfortable topics such as my beliefs about religion and spirituality. Thank you for sharing your story about your angel in a very real way, and for sharing YOUR light with the rest of us. Big hugs for you and your family.

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  16. I have to say thank you for pushing me to the hardware store tomorrow. I have been meaning to secure furniture for a few months now. I however had not thought of our small dressers. Last summer my Megan who is 2 was outside playing while I soaked up some sun and read. She had crawled through the tunnel on our playset and was waving and laughing in the crows nest. She got back down to crawl through the tunnel again so I looked back down at my book. I had the strongest urge to look up. When I did I saw her hanging 10 feet in the air by the handle for the ladder. I ran the 30 feet across the yard in the slowest motion just praying for her little hands to keep holding on. I got there in time and was only able to reach her just below the knees but she knew it was safe to let go. I just held her and then got up and took the bottom 5 boards off the ladder so no kids can climb up and then nailed them to crows nest to prevent them from going down. I wish we could put them in a safety bubble. Thank you for sharing your grief and letting people know that it never goes away and it won't get better over time, you just get numb from the pain for longer periods of time.

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    1. Crystal,

      Oh, gosh! So glad she was ok! Thank you for your message. Peace,
      Kim

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  17. I just felt I needed to post a comment to thank you. My daughter died at the age of 9 months old after a television fell on top of her. I made the biggest mistake of my life because I was the one moving the televison that day. I too have reached a place in my grief where I have accepted responsibility of her death. It was my fault no matter what any one tells me. Your words could have been taken right out of my mouth. Your daughter is absolutely beautiful and I will always remember her story.

    I am also a safey advocate and explaining how very important it is for people to secure their television and furniture, life can change in an instant.

    Thank you for sharing her with the world. My daughters name is Mckenna Jodell and she too was blonde haired and blue eyed. So your Meggie has touched my heart. Thank you again.

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    1. Ashley,

      I'm so, so sorry about the loss of Mckenna. Might I share her name and perhaps a picture on Meghan's facebook page?

      Wishing you peace,
      Kim

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  18. I want to tell you, as I am sure you have heard thousands of times, your stories truly touched me. I have never had anyone describe feelings in such a way that I almost felt them myself. My youngest daughter was in an auto accident when she was 12 1/2 yrs old. She will be 21 in a couple weeks. That day was the last I heard her voice, her giggle, saw her walk or eat. It was the last time I got a kiss/hug and "Love you mommy". While I still have my daughter, which is what so many say, she is not the child she was that morning, nor will she ever be. Understand that I know she is my Angel here on earth and has much personality and charm, just in different ways. You give me hope to learn to grieve for the loss, something all say I have yet to do. I have fought it for fear it would engulf me. Thank you so much for finding the strength to share such personal vulnerable information with a population of people like myself that you likely will never meet. Thank you.

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    1. Jennifer,

      Thank you for your message. I can't imagine the pain you must feel, so similar I'm sure, yet so different. Tell her I wish her a happy 21st birthday! :-)

      Peace,
      Kim

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  19. Hello, Kim..I don't have any children, but I have felt the pain of 'what if'...or 'if only'...My 9 month old nephew and Aunt drowned in a swimming pool at her boyfriends' home. My Great-Gran called me that morning to go with them, I begged off, because I had just gotten in from night shift. Later that day I went over to see if everyone had fun...my Great-gran came running to my car crying,(never seen her cry)and saying 'they are dead'...the pain felt like a dull knife cutting at my heart, it would not stop, as family came over and friends, the pain was intense, it just would stop, I thought just cry and get it out, but it would not stop, just hacking at my heart, finally I had to go home or just get out of that house with so much crying. My family told me not to go, but I had to get away, the pain would not stop, I thought maybe sleep, but no, still cutting,hacking..finally I sat up in bed and screamed,'dear GOD take this pain out of my heart, and instantly,..INSTANTLY it was gone,..I looked around to see if someone was there,I went to sleep. The next day, no pain, sadness but no pain...I was able to help others, hugging, loving on them, and holding on to my Great-Gran. The 'what ifs'..and..if only...will tear your heart apart, I have felt that, that was the only question in my head what if I had just gone over there,..if only I pass on sleep and just went with them...I believe in GOD, well, that night in 1985..I know, there is a GOD. My heart goes out to you and others who have suffered with 'what if'..and 'if only'...Thank you, Kim for your story. It shows just how much we are connected, if only we reach out...I love you and yours..BIG HUG!!

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    1. Jackie,

      thank you for your message. I'm so sorry about the loss of your aunt and nephew. How devastating! I'm so glad your faith has helped you through and to heal.

      Peace to you,
      Kim

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  20. Kim, thank you for this post. We reposted your Angel Day post on our facebook page, both to raise awareness and because of the incredible way you are able to put words to your grief. I am so grateful for this post, because it made me realize this discussion of responding to someone else's feelings of guilt after a death is something that isn't talked about nearly enough, despite the fact that it impacts so many after accidental deaths, suicides, overdoses, and do many other losses. I just posted on things not to say to someone after a death, and I completely neglected the topic guilt and how others respond. You echo something that so many experience when others tell them not to feel guilty. I will definitely be updating my post with inspiration from you. Thank you!

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  21. Thank you very much. Part of my motivation in sharing my experiences here is that I hope it helps others in their journey.

    Peace,
    Kim

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  22. Hello,

    I ran across your post on my friend's Facebook page. First of all, I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you - she is a beautiful little girl. Second of all, thank you. Thank you so much. I have been meaning to secure our furniture for a long time...but never got around to it. Because of your post, we have secured my daughter's dresser, bookcase, our dressers, and our night stands. We have also ordered the straps for our TV and will install them as soon as we get them.

    please know that your daughter is helping to save lives.

    Thanks, Stephanie

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  23. This was a beautiful post and really resonated with me. My first son Cale was stillborn. I have such guilt for it. I know logically there was nothing I could have done. But still. I'm his mother and I carried him and he died. I will forever have guilt and sadness over it. Thank you for sharing all of your feelings, for validating them and validating all of us who feel that way.

    Thank you again for sharing Meghan with us and sharing her story. I just wish things were so very different. I will be forever grateful to her for making my 18 month old safer as your post prompted me to take those steps of securing our furniture.

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  24. Kimberly,
    after reading your story I posted a review on the website of the store where I had bought a vertical file cabinet that nearly fell on my daughter. I have received feedback from the store that they are taking it very seriously and are notifying the manufacturer. I hope that they will include metal brackets with all their tall furniture or furniture pieces with drawers. I have shared with them your post from December and have drawn attention to the fact that toddlers are attracted to drawers: they either want to climb on the lower drawer or pull themselves up on an open top drawer.

    You can maximize the impact of your daughter's tragedy if you contact the consumer protection department of all major furniture manufacturers and share the story with them. They are extraordinarily worried about strict liability claims exactly in such cases and will hopefully go to great lengths to prevent it.

    Best,
    Imola

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  25. Thank you, Imola. May I ask which store it was?

    I have, in the past, contacted furniture stores and manufacturers to no avail. Some, take it seriously, others apparently feel the risk is too small. It is in my short term plan to do this again. Without mandated guidelines for safety, it's extraordinarily difficult to get all manufacturers to be aware and on board.

    The Consumer product safety commission is aware of the dangers and working with voluntary standards organizations on this, but it's a slow and bureaucratic process. I just started a petition to try to get it before Congress again. https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/petition/mandate-all-furniture-and-televisions-are-sold-tip-over-warnings-and-anchors-safely-secure-them-wall/CdpL6Twf?utm_source=wh.gov&utm_medium=shorturl&utm_campaign=shorturl

    Thanks for your help!
    Kim

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  26. Hello, Kim. I had bought that file cabinet from Office Depot.
    Good luck with all your efforts!
    Imola

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    1. Hello, Kim.
      I'm sorry to hear that your efforts so far have not brought about the expected results. I would send in your blog post from December to several parenting magazines for publishing. It is very well written and will certainly create a strong reaction among readers.

      Also, I would contact consumer safety advocacy groups. Why should you fight alone, when it's more efficient to join forces with skilled lobbyists.

      Your blog post has apparently already been shared on Facebook - I would suggest a wider dissemination.

      So far, the only furniture manufacturer that has been consistent in supplying metal brackets with all taller furniture pieces is IKEA.

      Good luck again!

      Best,
      Imola

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  27. Finally did an update post to our "what not to say" post based on this (and inspired by you!). Thanks so much for all the work you are doing and your honesty with your grief experience. It is certainly and inspiration to others. http://whatsyourgrief.com/guilt-and-grief/

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  28. Kimberly,
    I lost my daughter Sydney Chance to a dresser and TV falling on her April 4, 2012. You took the words right out of my mouth. People always say that I shouldn't feel guilty but like you say, you didn't protect her that day and I didn't protect Chance that day. And it eats me up everyday. People think that they're saying things to help but I feel like sometimes they shouldn't say anything. I started blogging in December and it's helped tremendously. So I know how you feel when people say that you're strong. It's not a matter of strength, you just have to get up. I wish I could lie in bed and wallow in my grief some days but if I did, Chance's death would be in vain and I can't allow that to happen. So thank you for saying what I wish I could say right now. Maybe I will tell my story on her "angel day" in April. Thank you again...

    Keisha

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  29. Nice Information! I personally really appreciate your article. This is a great website. I will make sure that I stop back again! furniture manufacturers

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  30. Hi Kimberly,
    My heart goes out to you. I'm so sorry about your loss. I had anchored some furniture to the walls, but will be doing the rest this weekend to protect our 3-year-old son. I'm curious as to what sort of words of support and/or comfort you've wanted from your husband throughout this ordeal. My wife just lost her beloved mother at a relatively young age, and she is feeling tremendous guilt over the loss--and specifically things she could or should have done that might have changed the outcome. Me just saying I'm sorry, listening, and hugging her is an inadequate response. What else would you suggest?

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